Click to listen highlighted text!

 

 

 

I Didn’t Cry

 

 

 

I’m going to the spring. . .       the forest has changed. . .          it’s going to snow soon. It is the equinox.

 

                                                                ***

 

I’m going to die again soon. . .     I know.     I’m used to it. . .

I’ve been born many times . . .       not for long. . .          Here it is again this time. . .

 

 

                                                                ***

 

I didn’t cry – I just really wanted to eat and my body was whining itself. . .

because I’m a puppy. . .       in the body of a puppy.

They don’t care about me. . .          They had a baby boy. . .     another.     Not me.

 

And I was given up. . .

First they poked me with a long needle. . .       to make me die. . .        It took them a long time to hit me in a deadly way. . .        Then I don’t remember. . .

 

Then it was very dark and very cold. . .        And I couldn’t hear anyone.

 

                                                                ***

 

After the abortion, she walked around quietly, . . .       thinking about the boy all the time. . .

She sat down next to the puppy in the yard. . .     she was patting his head. . .    said: ” … my good, good… ”        And I came back. . .         to live in the body of this puppy.

 

Soon she got pregnant again and stopped patting me. . .       she thought there were fleas. . .

When I rushed to meet her and pulled the chain up on my hind legs. . .      was wheezing, I wasn’t very good at barking, the collar pinched my throat, she shouted menacingly:  ” … no, sit…    what a fool…  “

 

 

 

Then she became even angrier when I yapped. . .           Once she beat me up me with a broom. . .     she said: “… damn you, you son of a bitch… ”         And I just wanted to say that they forgot to feed me today. . .        and also that the chain is heavy and prevents me from walking – a few steps in one direction, then back – the chain does not allow further.

 

 

I don’t want her patting my head anymore. . .         They have become completely strangers. . .    I think I’m going to die soon. . .      not because I’m old or ill – I’m only three years old – but because you can’t live longer in the body of a dog. . .

I don’t know who told me that – I’ve never spoken to anyone. . .

 

 

Then I’ll probably be born again in someone else’s body – it’s always been like this before. . .

I don’t remember when or how many times. . .      a lot. . .    – everything was confused in my head. . .

 

 

                                                                ***

 

She tells him that boys should not cry, because he always cries when he wants something from his parents, and they do not give it.

I don’t cry either. . .      I’m a boy after all.

 

 

                                                                ***

 

 

And I also know that he is not their own. . .      this other boy. . .         I can see what gets out of his head sometimes. . .       when he’s mad at them.

 

I also see others who live in his head.

They are not people

They are

They are

 

 

Click to listen highlighted text!